Imagine being in your early to mid 30’s. You’ve obtained one or more college degrees. Finally settled into a job that pays above the national average. Maybe you have a family and children. You’ve recently purchased a home and new-model car.
This is the life you’ve somewhat pictured having when complaining about moving out of your parents’ home because you didn’t like their rules years ago. How does that sound? Most would say, “Sign me up for something like that.”
I must agree that the life depicted above sounds pretty complete. Many of you may have that life or one close to it. Maybe a detail or two are varied. But even a life such as above can feel empty at times. So what’s missing?
What we describe is possessions that you’ve accumulated and things that make up your being and existence. Your stuff, your degrees, your family. Let’s call it your life bubble.
Life bubbles are all the things that you have accumulated and come in contact with on a regular basis. You work hard for your bubble. You don’t want any outsiders disturbing your bubble.
We can get so caught in the pursuit of accumulation to enhance our bubbles, that we forget or neglect to help our fellow man. The simple fact is that the act of giving can bring about more pleasure to us than we think.
But to understand the benefits, let’s first dispel some common misconceptions that many have about giving:
Giving isn’t always about money
We all know that not-for-profit organizations and various causes need money to be effective, but that is not the only way to give. Taking time out of your schedule to spend time with someone or contribute to a cause can often times be more impactful. Think about the kids that are in the Big Brothers, Big Sisters program. They are looking for someone to spend time with, not a donation or handout. They could care less how much money you have or are willing to give. They want your time and companionship.
Giving isn’t always about recognition
Although many celebrities have many not-for-profit organizations and give away lots of money, I’m always more impressed with the ones that do not look to have a huge gala or party. Now I’m not saying there’s anything wrong with that approach. But I like people who do something behind the scenes without the glamour and fanfare.
It’s not necessary to boast about how big of a check you wrote to someone or how many volunteer hours you’ve contributed to various causes. I’ll revise Nike’s slogan for you to use in this situation. “Just Do It…and Stay Humble.”
Giving isn’t always about knowing who and what receives the benefit
Have you ever had a great idea or been approached with an idea and took so long to process the information that you never act upon the opportunity?
As humans, we fear being taken advantage of. And writing as a man, I know that we fret over getting “played” or embarrassed. Our egos can be fragile and the damage we may endure from feeling used is real.
Sure there are scams and people looking to take advantage of them and we should do our due diligence to ensure that they are reputable. But don’t wait so long that you end up doing nothing. Take solace in the fact that you’re intentions were pure, no matter the outcome.
Giving isn’t just appropriate around a significant event or day
Many of us do the majority of our giving around holidays, such as Thanksgiving and Christmas. I suspect this is because we are around family and thankful for the life we have been blessed to have. You’ll find some of us delivering toys, serving at soup kitchens and missions just to name a few things.
But keep in mind that donations and volunteers are needed 52 weeks a year.
So Why Should You Give
Hey, we know right now it’s tough to find extra money to give. The economy is making all of us tighten our spending. In addition, our limited free time prohibits us from volunteering. But there are a few reasons you should consider giving:
Gives You a Sense of Purpose
Knowing that you’ve positively affected someone’s life can give you a sense of purpose that lacks when focusing just on yourself and self-gratification.
Makes You Live Longer
According to a study conducted by The Cooperation for National & Community Service, Those who engage in volunteer activities are less likely to suffer from ill health later in life and may be introduced into a positive reinforcing cycle of good health and future volunteering.
Allows You to Be the Change You Want to See
Ghandi is credited for the quote “Be the Change You Wish to See”. And that’s a phrase I try to live by. It’s easy and lazy for us to sit back and complain about issues that we do not like or agree with. But giving and volunteering to a cause that help bring change we want to see is a giant step toward progress.
Brings Communities Together
Many organizations and causes have events where diverse groups of people come together for a common goal. These people would probably never interact with each other outside of a volunteer effort. No matter gender, sexual preference, cultural backgrounds, giving and volunteering with a singluar focus can break down barriers.
Teaches Your Kids About Humility
If you live a normal middle-class and up lifestyle with children, they can easily feel entitled to what they have. By exposing them to giving and volunteering, they will see the other side of life. Examples of how kids can learn would be to:
- Make them give a portion of their allowance or earnings
- Conduct a toy/clothes sweep where they periodically give away some of the possessions they’ve accumulated over the year.
- Participate in 1K/5K walk/runs
There are so many more benefits to doing something for our fellow man. I really think that if we each committed to doing something that goes beyond pleasing ourselves, we would ultimately reap the benefits!
Do you have any stories or comments about giving or volunteering? Please feel free to share them with the Men’s Playbook community in the comment section.
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This is a great post. I like the topic, since it’s one you don’t get to read about.
Funnily enough, I just read a blog post that referred to Kiva.org. Apparently it’s an organization that allows you to give microloans to people in developing countries.
I totally agree that giving gives you a greater sense of purpose. It is a really strong motivator.
Kaizan´s last blog ..Does Telling Everyone About Your Goals Make You More Likely to Achieve Them?
Giving also allows you to see the wealth you already possess and makes room for other ‘things’ in your life.
Becoming Wealthy by Giving Things Away http://universitymindlab.wordpress.com/page/3/
Bakari´s last blog ..Which You, Which Intelligence?
@Kaizan – Thanks for stopping by the site and for the information on Kiva.org. I will have to check it out.
@Bakari – Your statement is really on point. We can get so blinded that we forget about the great things we do have.